UH!!! FINALLY......AT LONG LAST....... the breakthrough conversation has emerged.... after 89 days of cold hard blizzarding days since our last conversation we have finally broken the iceberg...... It came unintentional.....It came out of the blue...... We were lost for words... astonished we are.....(at least on my part i was....dont noe abt you u were quiet through out while i did most of the talking but tts actually like the norm haha).... unintended it was....sudden it was... i was in a way forced into it as i had to pretend tt there was nth crappy between us...... in actual fact.... actually i was quite happy it happened though i was hesitating.....

A msg sent... a reply recieved.... but im lost for words....like u are as u said in ur reply.... why? why do u nw take the blame when in actual fact it has all along nt have been much of ur fault?Damn.......

The words I said to you are now empty, empty like the world I live in..........

One's experiences may change him/her into someone he/she don't know, a moments insanity could make you regret and blow your whole world down.

Your words.......his words.....combined......It haunts me every other passing "stoning" moment.......But from it I have achieved a new insight, a new perspective, a new angle of ideaology (Such a way of expression may not exist) in to this situation that I have from a rather early stage been blind in.....But now its hard.... I don't know what to do....Damn....But really.....What CAN I do NOW? Pretty much nothing I reckon....

Talking about you makes me feel so happy and excited....... but a streak of sadness strikes me after each "replay" of the many scenes of memories....... Its been 73 days since we had any form of conversation...... and the last conversation wasnt a very cool one either.... I wonder how long is this silence gonna last? How long this feelings for you will last? It sickens me that we're not talking..... and your probably fine with it cos i once told you id rather we dont talk..... you dun hav to b so obedient and listen to what i said this time u noe? Not gonna see you for three months soon......

Exams are finally over....... it didnt exactly go very well..... as expected -_-" since i was WAITING for the exams instead of preparing for it...... Right now, id b very happy if i manage to maintain my GPA......its nt tt im nt aiming high... im just being realistic..... youll get the idea if u got to see my answers for my exam papers. "name 2 ways to examine faecal specimens" not only did i giv just one way... it was a ridiculous answer...."mash the shit and isolate the microbes and observe under the microscrope" wtf? lol i dun deny that under the insanity caused by the trauma from being unable to answer questions in the exam i decided to b lame write such a stupid answer... i tot it was a gd chance for me to giv a stupid answer that i can laugh abt since ive nv done such a thing like tt......

During the exams, it seemed as if i had a lot of things to do..... now tt im temporary free for a week.... im bored, i seem to nt have anyth to do and the games are boring....

On the day that i finished my exams, my fellow frens hu were in jc were taking their A lvl results..... the atmosphere must have been tensed there... it brought back fond memories of taking my O lvl results..... most of my frens did quite well.... some even surpassing what i would expect from them.... which got me thinking abt this very OLD AND UNSOLVED argument with myself abt whether it have been a right choice for me to have come to a poly? or would i have done better in JC..... ? of course as always im siding with "i should have gone to jc" i think i wud have done rather well in JC -_-" or perhaps im seeing myself too up? well its gonna continue being a mystery.... but i sure hope sumth good comes out from this poly education of mine of which i hav serious doubts in -_-"

On an angrier note..... DAMN!!!FUCK THOSE NO LIFE GEEKS IN THOSE TOP JCS!!!!! I quote "Its embarassing to get 4 As" well i say FUCK YOU YOU CAN GO FUCK YOUR MUM DAD GRANMA UR DOG OR WHATEVER UPSIDE DOWN!!!YOU NEED TO GET A LIFE MAN!!!!

*Damn its been about 3 or 4 months since we've talked...............*